Admit It: Brock Samson
by ShanaO
Summary: Another installment of 'Admit It'. Dedicated to 'More Horses and Bayonets'. Thank you for the review! Admit it, you've had at least one of these thoughts about Brock Samson.


**A/N:** I originally wasn't going to do any more 'thought rambles' on Venture Bros., but after the review from _**More Horses and Bayonets**_ I decided to try another. I know they aren't stories, but I guess it's a good way to warm up. So, thank you to _**More Horses and Bayonets**_ for the nice review! This is dedicated to you. I appreciate it. Here goes, I've just finished all the new episodes of season 5, but even so, I might be rusty with my thoughts.

Admit it, you've had at least one of these thoughts about Brock Samson.

At first, you were cautious about watching Venture Bros., but after Brock Samson spoke and you realized it was Joe Swanson from Family Guy, you knew you were gonna like this show. Much more if you thought of Kronk in all his hilarious, yet endearing, stupidity.

Then, when he merciously destroyed all those guys with his clothes and a glance, you were hooked.

You laughed so hard when he fought that random alligator/crocodile thing.

You respect Brock for not using a gun.

At first, you had a sneaking suspicion Brock was Hank's father. They both have blonde hair and Hank looks up to Brock, that was good enough for you. You still kinda hope, even if you know it's not true.

You wonder why Brock suddenly has those dark gray circles under his eyes. Does he not drink enough water? Or is it a sign of old age? You hope not. Brock will never grow old. His awesome mullet protects him. Why else would he have it?

Seems only Brock can rock a mullet. A mullet looks epic on Brock.

How Brock never murdered Dr. Venture was beyond you.

You were happy when the show confirmed Mal was the one Brock loved. Somehow, only Mal was right for him. No other woman would do.

You have the clip where Brock mows down all those henchmen with his car saved on your Youtube account. You secretly watch it when you're feeling down and love the music. It makes you happy to see all that carnage. You feel bad for the henchmen though. You love the henchmen.

Whenever you can, you try to show people that clip, in hopes to lure them to the show just so you have someone to watch it with.

Brock looks awesome in his Sphinx uniform.

You were so sad when Brock wasn't their bodyguard anymore, it's just not the same with Sargent Hatred, but you're glad Brock somehow gets into shinanagins with Team Venture. It wouldn't be the same if they didn't at least keep that.

Brock cares for the boys a lot, probably more than Dr. Venture ever will, and seeing that side of Brock makes him one of your favorite characters even more.

At first you wondered how Brock ever got away with just plain murder, then he whips out his 'license to kill' and you think, 'yeah, that makes sense.' Though, even if Brock didn't have the license, you think, who would really stop him? That guy is a murder machine. It feeds him. He needs it to live.

Those poor, poor henchmen. How does The Monarch manage to recruit them all after the therapy bills? You know they wake up with night terrors screaming: "No Brock Samson, NO!"

You felt for Speedy. He was so close to his wings. Poor, stupid Speedy. You kinda hope he'll come back, but after five seasons, it's probably not gonna happen.

You kinda didn't like Brock after he killed that one henchmen, you know, the one who eventually turned into Venturestein. You're glad Brock has some sort of guilt about it, but, does it really help?

That was the one moment you cursed Brock. That poor guy.

Despite his making you mad, you can't _stay _mad at him. That would be crazy.

You wonder what it'd be like if Brock faced off against Chuck Norris, then you think, "What? No, Brock would win, no question." Him and Patrick Stewart are the only ones who can beat Chuck Norris. Oh yeah, and don't forget Batman. In fact, if Chuck Norris went to the darkside, and it could happen, look at Vader, the only people who could stop him would be Brock Samson, Patrick Stewart, and Batman. Heck, it could happen.

You know if Brock Samson fought Superman, even if he is the 'Man of Steel', somehow, Brock Samson would win. You just ignore everything about Superman and just know that Brock would win, you don't even would be no question. You firmly believe that with just a glance Superman would bow down to Brock and cry: "I'm not man enough, O Brock Samson!"

A/N: So, there it is. Like it? Who should I do next? Should I continue?


End file.
